My "Story"

Everyone has to have a Story, right? Well mine starts out many years ago....

I grew up VERY normal sized. But you see I grew up with a father who was always telling me how pretty my face was and to make sure that I never got "fat". When I had "normal" flucuations in weight at earlier ages, he told me that I was getting fat (we're talking a 5-10lbs flucuation in weight as kids grow) and to do something about it, cause "You have such a pretty face". Everything was always centered around looks. I'm sure many of you can relate.


When I jetted off to college at the ripe old age of 16 (graduated a few year early) I was 5'4" tall and weighed about 120lbs soaking wet and I suddenly thought I need to be thinner than I already was. I crash dieted down to 108lbs and my dad was THRILLED with the new SKELETAL me - see ------>


Everyone told me how "great" I looked and I, of course, ate it all up, thinking this was how I needed to be to REALLY be accepted. Well, you can only starve yourself for so long and exercise 3+ hours a day until you can't do it anymore. Sadly this brought my previously "dormant" PCOS (see a great definition here: http://oak.cats.ohiou.edu/~cp391990/whatispcos.html ). In 6 months time I gained 60lbs. The next time my father saw me he cried. Not from tears of joy, but tears of shame. From that point on he refused to carry a picture of me (and currently won't have one of me in his home) due to his embarrassment.


This started years of dieting and losing and gaining and losing and gaining and never really getting down a good normal weight again. My body was just tired of losing the same pounds over and over, meanwhile it was ruining my metabolism and my insulin resistance grew worse and worse. I had had 5 different doctors tell me that I'd always be fat and to the "the best I could". I now know why, my body is so metabolically resistant that losing has been VERY difficult. Add to that my Endocronologist told me it would take me 3 hrs of exercise to get what most people get from 30-60 minutes of exercise, because my body thinks I lie in bed all day. Problem with the exercise is that I have Fibromyalgia. Exercising is a REAL challenge for me. Anything over 15 minutes of walking, puts me in bed for at least 2-3 hrs from lethargy and the pain lasts for several days. It's like my body HATES me when I exercise and punishes me from doing it. So for now I walk a little bit and I'd say any little bit helps!


Fast forward many years.....I've been as high as 301 and as low as 108 and I met my new husband at around about 212. He fell in love with me exactly as I am. No pressure to lose weight, but encouraging me to lose what I wanted for ME, not him. I admit, I drive him crazy with all my weight talk and food talk and healthy eating talk....therefore I'm going to try and direct it all to my blog and spare him a bit! LOL He can read this once and be done with it!! LOL

After trying Weight Watchers for 2-1/2 years and never cheating and only going off plan 7x in that whole period I lost a whopping 56lbs. Now that is a lot if that's near all you need to lose, but not when you have 150lbs to lose and not in 2-1/2 year and NOT when you don't cheat. Of course, I was accused of cheating time and time again and accused of being an emotional eater and denying my problems, not only by Weight Watcher leaders but by "support boards" - I'd list my journel and eat a beautifully "balanced" diet and the scales just didn't move well. Then my Endocrinologist decided to "try" a different and new diabetic drug (to help with the insulin resistance) and I gained 40lbs back in 3 months. I was devastated. I then gave up and for 2 years I ate whatever I wanted (not giant portions, not super junk food - just "regular" food).

Then one day I stepped on the scale and "dum dum dum" - it was over 300lbs - 301 to be exact (see picture on right). I was terrified of what that would mean for me. Would I just continue to grow larger and larger and diet "buried in a piano box" (as my dad used to warn me about)? I started talking to a friend who had been on a Weight Watcher Support board for many years like me and was too unsuccessful at losing her weight and she told me about a lapband. Here is a link to what a lapband is: http://www.allerganandinamed.com/products/obesity/us/patient/lapband/prodinfo.aspx

I felt this was an excellent option for me - although I will admit that my Endocrinologist wanted me to try a low-carb diet - of which I did but could barely lose eating less than 5 carbs a day and that was on a perfect induction. You see, all these years of dieting made me so super duper resistant to losing weight. So in July of 2005 I had a lapband placed and honestly do not regret my decision whatsoever. I have lost 75lbs since my lapband was placed but was struggling to lose any more weight after that.

I decided to "revisit" the low-carb diet but this time in combination of a lower calorie diet as well. Now low calorie for me is not low calorie to most people. I'm eating about 1500 calories a day and under 50 carbs a day (more like 30-40 most days) and am losing very nicely now. If I go up in calories, the losing slows or stops, if I go up in carbs the losing slows or stops. I think, for now, I've found a good spot to stay.

Here is a current picture of me since losing that 75lbs:

I feel pretty proud of where I've come but I have LONG ways to. Another 50-60lbs and then I'll need to start looking at some plastic surgery as I've got a LOT of sagging skin. My arms and stomach are the worst with my legs coming in next (I told my husband they look like elephant trunks! LOL)

My family is also on board with the whole low-carbing lifestyle as well. My own 15 year old daughter, after being medicated for her extremely high insulin levels has also lost 40lbs from drastically reducing her carbs. She is now an advocate at her high school for obese teens and recommends a low-carb lifestyle as the way to eat and live. My husband is also pre-diabetic and controls his blood sugars by this way of living.


Thanks for getting to the bottom of this long introduction and in the next post I'll be explaining why I chose a lapband at all, why I feel it's WAY safer than a gastric bypass and how people lump all weight loss surgery into one group when this is entirely different.